an evening at the pub...part 1

It's been a week since I moved in to my new place and while my classes don't start until tomorrow I have been busy these past 8 days. Aside from learning that Hyde Park might just be the runners capital of the world, the fact that if you wear a pink shirt you will be silently judged, and you seem to need at least an Audi to deserve a parking spot in Hyde Park Square I recently started working my newest job: Tending bar. That's right. a couple nights out of the week when I'm not busy with Grad school I will be in charge of serving alcoholic beverages to other people, and getting paid to do so!
The interview was about as difficult to pass as the PFJ's: You're over 21 and you know alcohol right? "...yes?" Alright you're in. SUCCESS!

The bar is called Ryan's and it's in the student center at Xavier. While most schools are trying desperately to have a dry campus, Xavier is actually putting Irish pub's on theirs. I have chosen the right school.
Any hoo.. the first 2 days of work have been very slow b/c of the moving into college process for the student drinking body and so I've had a decent amount of free time. Seeing as how you can only wipe a bar in circular motions (wax on...) for so long I decided to come up with the top 25 (ish) guys I'd most like to have a drink with. When I first came up with the idea my brain went into over drive. I was thinking about characters and dead people and it got too crazy. So to keep the list as short as possible I decided to keep it to real people, who are currently living. I also tried to make it be people who we all have just about zero percent chance of ever drinking with. I took the liberty of putting down what I feel you'd be most likely to drink with these people. The list is in no particular order and, as always, up for debate. Shall we being...? First up, someone a lot of people now know thanks to The Hangover.

Zach Galifinaikas Killian's Irish Red Zach has recently gained much over due fame by playing a creepy pedophile but his best work to date is actually in the far less popular but equally funny Out Cold. He also has a hilarious comedy DVD titled Live at the Purple Onion in which he drinks what appears to be Killian's after Killian's while playing the classic piano, bashing the crowd, and playing his own fake twin brother. I'm also pretty sure his beard gives him special drinking powers.

Vinnie Jones: Carlsburg If you don't know who Vinnie Jones is throw in Snatch or Lock, Stock
and you'll discover that he is the ultimate English bad ass. Tall, lanky, can't way more than 150 pounds and terrifying. To learn why he's on the list watch Eurotrip to see him open two pints of beer at the same time. With his eye lids. My baby takes the morning train...

Glen Hansard: Guinness; Whiskey, Warm Glen, like Zach, is starting to become a little bit more well known but most people have no idea who he is. Glen is the Lead singer of the bands the Frames and the Swell Season but is perhaps most known for his part in Once and his ridiculous singer/songwriter talent. The best thing about him though is that he tells ridiculous (usually pointless) stories during live concerts in between songs with his insanely thick Irish accent. Also, as is expected from any good Irishman, his face is blanketed by a beautiful orange beard. Slante'!

Gerard Butler The Blood of a million Persians, actually Stoli, Straight You might be saying right now, "Really Adam.. That guy from the ugly truth?" Yes that guy. He's also the guy who has played the Phantom of the Opera and King Leonidas in the most bad ass movie since Pulp Fiction. This man went from being a lawyer, quitting because he drank too much, becoming an actor, staring as one of the most intense singing leads you can find, to having 18 pack abs to nailing Katherine Hiegl. Hey Russel Crowe...He's better than you.

Jeremy Piven: Scotch, Rocks How can Buddy Israel not make the list? Wait... that's not what he's known for? I kid. But in all reality, what other actor would any male want to be on the planet? I would go to a movie theatre to watch this man do drugs off a midget. Which i hear he's into. Hug it out bitch!

Jim Rome Bombay Sapphire, but only 2. "any more and you get sloppy" The king of smack. Romey himself. from 12-3 every day millions of listeners hear him make fun of everything sports related. He gets the best athletes to come on his show and for some reason has serious man crushes on the likes of Ryan Garko, Benny Fransisco and...

Delonte West Red MD 20/20 If the only knowledge you had of Delonte West was his basketball skill you'd say, "Yeah he's a decent guard, but I'd never want to hang out with him." But thanks to Rome is Burning, Youtube, and his ridiculous post game interviews we know that Delonte wants "That Hot Sauce in the bag", that if you ever hang out with him you "Better have my donuts" and that the man has face herpes. I know Jay hates his playing style and all but he's aces in my book. "How playa is that man?"

Andrew McMahon Rolling Rock This one is a little different b/c if you attended the Jack's Mannequin concert at John Carroll (I was unable to, but Vegas was a nice substitute) you may have gotten the chance to have drinks after the show with Andrew. He went out to bars after. Since I did not. He makes the list. As lead singer of the piano rock bands Something Corporate and Jack's Andrew not only fronts two amazing bands, but he is also a cancer survivor who really seems to appreciate life. That and before his cancer bout I'm pretty sure he drank a case of the Rocks during concerts.

Wayne Rooney Newcastle He's built like a football player, is faster then most sprinters, looks like his face melted and he'll chip you from 18 out. If any soccer player on the planet can be considered a bad ass it's this one. All that AND Joe Bott named his dog after him!

Christopher Walkin Anything the man wants, It's Christopher freaking Walkin The man's got a fever and we all know the prescription. He's weird, he's funny, and every single one of us thinks we can do a Walkin impression. You look at him wrong and he'll stab you in the face with a soldering iron. I would drink with this man just to hear him talk. Hopefully he'll have brought kittens!


That's all for part one, I hope you agree. Feel free to tell me who I missed
Part 2 will be soon to come. Until then... Nastrovia!

The first few days

If you're reading this you probably already know that a few days ago I moved down to Cincinnati to attend graduate school at Xavier University. Seeing as how this is the first time I've lived completely on my own I figured I would write about the experience. Maybe it'll be funny, maybe it'll be entertaining, or maybe no one will read it but regardless every couple of days or so I plan on writing something. we'll see how long i stick to it. Here. We. Go. (claps hands together...and I thought my jokes were bad.)

Since moving in on Saturday I've learned a few things that I thought I would share.

-First and foremost- It doesn't matter how nice your couch is if it doesn't make it through the door. Overstuffed couch + narrow apartment hallways= someone else taking your couch from the corner. Currently I have 2 chairs in its place. You can't see it by I'm frowning right now.

-If you put in a request for something to be fixed by maintenance and you're not there, they will unlock your apartment, fix it, and then use different locks so you stare at your door confused for 10 minutes thinking you're at the wrong place. I kept waiting for Ashton to jump out with cameras...

- Don't be nice and introduce yourself to your 80 year old, oxygen tank carrying neighbor; they WILL ask you to carry things for them within 5 minutes of meeting them. Why do the elderly love beats so much?

-The Chopper is the single greatest kitchen tool ever created. I have chopped at least one thing at every meal.

-Single bedroom apartments have more storage space then one person could possibly ever need but for some reason they only supply roughly 9 inches of kitchen counter space.

-I've talked to my family more these last few days on the phone then i did in person.

-You can George Foreman just about anything.

-On the food note... even though I picked out literally every edible thing in my kitchen why do I still open the fridge 15 times a day looking for something to eat?

Alright, that's all for now. Today is moving in time for the incoming freshman and I need to get off campus as soon as possible.

Quick thanks to my parents, Alex, and Heather and Matt for helping me move in. Love you guys!!!


PS... if you know of a browns backer's bar in Cincy please let me know!